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04 September 2005 @ 08:09 pm
First of three posts!  
Oh God, I've been prolific lately. Save the women and children. Unfortunately it's not a new chapter of "Soldier", but I do have three fics ready for posting.




Reasoning

By Cate

Summary: Set just after Julia's death. John is frightened and depressed, and Paul is worried for his friend.

Word Count: 506.

"Johnny... open the door...."

"Fuck off." John huddled in the corner of the bathroom, leaning against the tub. His voice cracked when he spoke, and he cursed himself for it.

"Johnny, c'mon out," pleaded Paul, rapping on the door.

"Go to hell, Macca," John sniffed, shifting to lie his head on the bathroom rug, pawing at it with a weak, shaky hand.

"Shh, shh... sweetie...." Paul cringed inwardly at his last word. Then he realised that the bathroom door did not, indeed, lock. He tried the knob and the door opened.

"Oh fuck, now you're going to try and make me feel better," fussed John. He addressed Paul's feet.

"Johnny, luv," murmured Paul, closing the door again and sitting on the floor near John. He gingerly touched John's hair, and John merely sniffled at him. "Oh John...."

"Why, Paul?" whispered John, moving so his forehead pressed against Paul's knee, taking some small, bizarre comfort at the touch.

"You can't expect me to answer that, John." Paul's reply was firm but gentle. He slowly stroked John's hair, other hand idle in his lap.

"Yes, I can. And I do. And you will." John shifted a bit further, laying his head on Paul's knee now. Paul lifted his dark brows in surprise.

"John. Look at me and tell me that there's any logical 'why' in this situation. There isn't." Tangling his long fingers in John's hair, Paul looked at the older boy's face. He was chewing on his lower lip, looking the most insecure and frightened Paul had ever seen him... and he couldn't help but feel frightened as well.

"There is," replied John, slowly. "Why her? Why did it happen?"

"Luv, I can't tell you that, you can't expect me to know... I loved her too, Johnny, as long as I knew her." Paul paused a moment, then gently cupped the back of John's head, moving it off of his knee and lying down beside him.

"But there has to be a reason, Paul," John sniffed, looking into the younger lad's dark eyes.

"Shh, John. There's never, never a reason. Not for an accident... not a good reason, anyway." Paul gasped softly in shock as John moved closer to him, practically burrowing into his chest; tentatively, he slid his arms around John, holding him.

"Mh. Make one up, then," replied John, firmly snugging his body up to Paul's, arms wrapping tightly around his waist.

"John, I'm not going to do that." Paul's voice was soft; gentle and kind in all the ways that made John's heart break just a little bit more.

"Have I ever told you that I hate you?" asked the older boy. He inhaled with every breath the scent that was exclusively Paul; he wasn't sure yet if he liked it or not, but he was used to it. It was welcome. Maybe he did like it.

"Johnny?" Paul furrowed his brow and rubbed John's back lightly, concerned. Softly, he kissed John's forehead, and John glanced up to meet his eyes.

"It's a lie."

- End.

Cate
 
 
Current Mood: workingworking
Current Music: "Drive My Car"-- Mark Benson & Gary Grimes
 
 
 
macca64macca64 on September 5th, 2005 02:27 am (UTC)
ohhh that was really good. i liked the ending how John is saying I love you without actually saying it.

so are you are you going to post the other stories, cos I always enjoy your stories.

and when is the next chapter of SoL going to be up???I love that story. Tell me what I said last time that made you update, so I can say it again, and you can post another chapter...but don't be rushed...delaid gratification as my ma would say...

well great jos in the longview. Happy writing!
Il Gatto Puzzolone: Mark Bensoncatnip_martini on September 5th, 2005 02:47 am (UTC)
Thank you very much, luv. Aye, I couldn't have him say "I love you", it's too early for that.

Done so already!

Oh Lord. *sigh* I'm having a bit of problem with this chapter. It'll be sometime this month. I don't work at all this month, so I should be able to get some steady work done on it; I think I have a thousand or so words out of six thousand and some. If I set a deadline, I'll end up killing myself for it, but I'd say it'll be done by the end of the month, if not (a whole lot) sooner.

Cate
macca64macca64 on September 5th, 2005 02:28 am (UTC)
ohhh that was really good. i liked the ending how John is saying I love you without actually saying it.

so are you are you going to post the other stories, cos I always enjoy your stories.

and when is the next chapter of SoL going to be up???I love that story. Tell me what I said last time that made you update, so I can say it again, and you can post another chapter...but don't be rushed...delaid gratification as my ma would say...

well great job in the longview.
Happy writing!
macca64macca64 on September 5th, 2005 02:28 am (UTC)
sorry for the double posting luv
oh_johnny_oh_johnny_ on September 5th, 2005 03:29 am (UTC)
He inhaled with every breath the scent that was exclusively Paul; he wasn't sure yet if he liked it or not, but he was used to it. It was welcome. Maybe he did like it.

Lovely. Very gentle and sweet.

Il Gatto Puzzolone: Mark Bensoncatnip_martini on September 5th, 2005 03:52 am (UTC)
Thank you. :) I really like working the tender element into fic.

Cate
the heart collectorsummersiren on September 5th, 2005 07:09 am (UTC)
Oh gosh, I agree. That line took my breath away. It's beautifully written!!

It's very lovely, sweet and soft.
whatsherass on September 5th, 2005 03:56 am (UTC)
"He inhaled with every breath the scent that was exclusively Paul; he wasn't sure yet if he liked it or not, but he was used to it. It was welcome. Maybe he did like it."

Sorry for being unoriginal, but that was my favorite line, too! :)
Il Gatto Puzzolone: Mark Bensoncatnip_martini on September 5th, 2005 04:26 am (UTC)
:)! I'm very proud of that line! So thank you!

Cate
oceanchild808oceanchild808 on September 5th, 2005 07:11 am (UTC)
Yeah, the scent of Paul line was my favorite too. Very nice job, very real, probably happened just like that too. Lovely!
oddballer35oddballer35 on September 6th, 2005 12:54 am (UTC)
Oh, so sad at first! I almost felt like crying myself until the end! Nice job! ^^